Monday, April 30, 2012

Monday Makeover: Blackbeard the Pirate

There are no bad characters, just characters that no one has spent far too much time thinking about how to make work. I intend to fix that.

April is Pirate-Themed Supervillain Month


The gangster Edward Thatch, better known as Blackbeard, made his first and only appearance in 1940's Batman #4.  He had discovered the secret location for the annual Gotham Yacht Club party during which the richest men and women in Gotham would compete to see who could put on the most lavish display of wealth.  Taking inspiration from his namesake (the real Blackbeard's name was Edward Teach, the writer appears to have mistakenly thought it was Thatch), he figured if he dressed himself and his men up as Blackbeard the Pirate and his crew that the authorities would never believe the story, and even if they did, no one would link the crime to him.  Putting aside the stupidity of choosing the one pirate who has the same name as you to remain anonymous, the plan actually worked with the Coast Guard ignoring the calls for help as a prank.  Unfortunately for Blackbeard, Batman and Robin didn't.  A short duel later, and him and his gang were in custody.  Batman would again meet Blackbeard the Pirate much later (or earlier, depending on your perspective) in the 2010 mini-series Batman: The Return of Bruce Wayne where an amnesiac Batman was sent bouncing through time and met the original Blackbeard who mistook him for the caped crusader of his day, the Black Pirate (it was better than it sounds).  That Blackbeard captured Batman in an attempt to force him to lead Blackbeard to the fabled treasure of the Black Pirate which was said to be hidden in a cave system outside of Gotham settlement, a cave system that would one day become the Batcave.


There isn't actually a lot I don't like about either incarnation of Blackbeard the Pirate.  While the fact that the gangster literally chose his own name as a pseudonym is a little odd, the bigger sin really is the writer not checking an encyclopedia to get it right.  Other than that, he's surprisngly well done for a one shot 16 page story villain.  By 1940s comic book logic, dressing up as pirates so that the police won't believe the story when your victims call in makes a certain amount of sense. He even explains that he hired a fencing instructor to teach himself and his crew so it 'makes sense' that a bunch of mobsters can sword fight like real pirates.  It's not exactly a reusable villain formula, but it wasn't bad as a starting point.  And there simply aren't any flaws with the "real" Blackbeard the Pirate Batman encounters in the past.


The historical Blackbeard the Pirate actually works pretty well as a Batman villain in his own right.  Gregarious characters almost always make for a nice contrast with Batman's more dour attitude (just as the Joker or the Riddler) and being a pirate, a professional murderer and thief, is more than enough to put him on the Batman's radar. Best of all, Blackbeard was known to light fuses in his beard to light fuses in his beard in order to create a demonic visage to turn his opponents into "a superstitious and cowardly lot."  Which officially puts him in the category of dark and twisted mirror images of Batman.  Indeed the only real problem with him being a Batman villain is that he lived and died a couple hundred years before Batman was ever born, and you can only do so many time travel stories before it starts to get ridiculous.  If only there was some way around those problems....


Blackbeard the Pirate is immortal.  Maybe he found the Fountain of Youth, maybe it was some other magical mishap, or maybe legends really never die.  Whatever the reason, in the DC Universe Edward Teach found himself to be immortal.  He loved the pirating life and kept to it for as long as he could, but eventually the world moved on.  Blackbeard was despondent at first but eventually he found ways to amuse himself.  Over the centuries, he's been a smuggler, a bootlegger, and most recently a mobster.  It wasn't the same, but it kept him busy.  Then superheroes and supervillains started popping up all over the place.  He started to get wistful for the good old days.  And then suddenly it happened: Sea Fox, Tiger Shark, Captain Stingaree, and Cap'n Fear.  It was a new Golden Age of Pirates in Gotham City, and Blackbeard wasn't going to let it pass him by.  He trained his gang in the pirating arts, and set forth to capture a yacht club.  And when Batman stopped him, he felt a pang of recognition.  Somehow the Black Pirate, the only man to ever beat him, had followed Blackbeard to the 21st Century.  The good times had come again.


Frontline of the Class War: "Rice and Beans", "Privilege You Earn", and Tax Returns

The Republicans are right, there is a class war going on in this country. And they're the ones waging it against the middle and working class:
  • Meanwhile, Jesse Kelly, the Republican running for Gabby Giffords old seat, thinks that access to healthcare (not health insurance, healthcare) is "a privilege you earn."
Welcome to the working week!

RonPaulStock: Because I Can Never Mock Ron Paul Supporters Enough

Some people would say that I will eventually get tired of mocking Ron Paul supporters.  Those people are wrong, because as crazy as the good Dr. Paul is (and trust me, he's really crazy), his supporters are inevitably crazier.  Sure Ron Paul believes that the International Baccalaureate program is a UN attempt to brainwash America's children, but Ron Paul supporters have created RonPaulStock (featuring such musical guests as The Industry and Axis Experience):
PaulStock is a grassroots festival that is dedicated to celebrating the message of Liberty, Peace and Freedom. Dr. Paul has given us an incredible opportunity to unite as a country, with that comes a great responsibility to spread this message far and wide. This is a message of hope. This is a message of TRUE change, “Revolutionary Change.” A movement that paves the path for a better future; a message that ignites a passion and enthusiasm that is contagious with young and old, left and right, liberal and conservative. A reminder of what makes this a great nation. This was the vision set forth by our founding fathers. Dr. Paul has sparked a fire in our hearts, has opened our eyes to the desperate need to restore our constitutional Republic and has inspired us all to become the best that we can be both in our own lives and how we relate to our neighbors here and around the world. The American dream lives within each and every one of us. It’s that dream that brings us together as a people.
Join us at PaulStock 2012 in the northern metro Atlanta area! A Liberty Jam that’s fun and community coming together in celebration of this message. Dr. Paul has already won. He has won the hearts and minds of so many around the globe. It’s in this very spirit of freedom and liberty; that PaulStock will be a memorable experience for all!
The REVOLUTION grows!
 I don't even know how to begin to mock that properly.

I Don't Think Romney is Closing That Gender Gap

There are at least a dozen devastating general election ads that can be made from this.  And even worse for Romney, it makes it crystal clear that the Obama campaign fully intends to tie him to every extremist whackjob in his party:

Weekly Weekend Caption Contest: Time to Vote

As a reminder, here's this week's photo:


And here are the submissions, vote for your favorite in the comments and then I will tally them up and announce who this week's Entertained Organizer Caption King or Queen is:

Reader Ralph:

Anonymous:

Our contributors have done their job, now it's time for you to do yours, vote for this week's Entertained Organizer Caption Contest King or Queen. Will it be:

Reader Ralph

or

Anonymous

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Sunday Short: Heavenly Appeals

Sundays should be a day to rest and relax. And what better way to do that than to take a few minutes to watch an animated short:

In which it pays to be nice:

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Love Lessons with Lois Lane: Superman and Lois Lane, Newlyweds!

In much of the civilized world, Saturday night is date night. And everything I know about dating I learned from Lois Lane. So before heading out for the night, let's see what advice she has for us this week:


If you feel trapped in a relationship, it's best to end it.  Especially if your partner is keeping you locked up in a popemobile "for your own good."

He-Man Woman Haters Club Report: Backwash, Secretaries, and "They Can Shop"

With classism, racism, and homophobia already in the mix, why wouldn't the GOP add in some sexism too:
  • If you were lucky enough to not have (or sleep through) an abstinence only education in high school and wondered what you missed, wonder no more
He said students drink the water while eating a snack and mixing some of their snack in the water. Then they exchange glasses. He asks them to drink the water, prompting students to say, "No, it looks nasty." "It's a way to show them that if they decided to be sexually active outside of a long-term committed relationship, they're putting themselves at risk," he said.
Because of course drinking backwash and having sex with a partner are exactly the same, and this will obviously both convince teenagers not to have sex AND not give girls serious issues about being "dirty."

  • Meanwhile, Nebraska Governor Dave Heineman vetoed a proposal to restore Medicaid-funded prenatal care for undocumented immigrants.  Now I'm trying to understand this decision.  Not the inhumanity of denying anyone prenatal care, I'm frankly used to that from Republican elected officials.  But Governor Heineman believes that life starts at conception, and when born in Nebraska the children of undocumented immigrants would be citizens.  So in his own warped little worldview, isn't Governor Heineman denying health benefits to US citizens?
  • Tennessee Republicans are moving forward with a bill that would criminalize "harming a fetus" if a woman miscarried at any point in her pregnancy.  Which besides being insane, will be somewhat legally problematic given that roughly half of all conceptions don't end in a birth.
Given all this, I can't imagine why anyone would think that Republicans are waging a War on Women.

Weekly Weekend Caption Contest

It's the weekend and you know what that means: The Entertained Organizer's Weekly Weekend Caption Contest! The rules are simple: You have until midnight Sunday to submit your caption to the photo either in the comments here or on Facebook. Then on Monday we'll vote to see who is this week's Entertained Organizer Caption King or Queen:



Friday, April 27, 2012

Friendship Friday with Jimmy Olsen: The Radioactive Boy!

Who better to teach us about the true meaning of friendship than Superman's Pal, Jimmy Olsen?




Friends DON'T play psychotic mind games on each other.

Friday Freakshow Roundup: Adventures in Crisis Management, Young Voters, and Experience

In the political news system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the Republicans who do insane things, and this blogger who mocks them. These are their stories:

  • Now I'm not a crisis management consultant, but I'm pretty sure that when Republican Georgia Gubenatorial candidate Dave Spence hired Matuschka Lindo Briggs to help him weather the whole 'I don't know if Obama is a Muslim' thing, he probably did not expect her to accidentally email the press corps his briefing memo on how to handle the issue.  Don't you love it when bad consultants happen to bad people?

This is How You Make an Ad

I spent some time yesterday mocking the RNC and Karl Rove for making some truly terrible political ads.  In the spirit of bipartisan support here is how you make a good ad (and if anyone can explain to me what Romney's strategy was when he said it wasn't worth catching Osama Bin Laden, I'd appreciate it):


See the difference?  Most of the ad is Bill Clinton talking which means, worst case, people won't here him, but even the images it flashes to make Obama look Presidential.  When it switches to attacking Romney, not only do they use the sound bite, but they also make sure that the quote is onscreen.  And probably most importantly in an attack ad, no part of this ad could be turned around and used as a positive ad by Romney.  Seriously guys, this is not that hard.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Ron Swanson Explains the Basics of Fundraising

Jeff from Community Explains the Perfect Crime

Monday Makeover: Captain Stingaree

There are no bad characters, just characters that no one has spent far too much time thinking about how to make work. I intend to fix that.  (And yes, I'm a little late this week.)

April is Pirate-Themed Supervillain Month


Karl Courtney, better known as Captain Stingaree, first appeared in 1976's Detective Comics #460.  He ran a pirate-themed restaurant and nightclub on his ship the Stingaree and had someone become convinced that his three brothers (they were all quadruplets) were actually working together as Batman and being funded by the Wayne Foundation.  This wasn't entirely as crazy as it sounds because his three brothers did in fact run a detective agency together (and of course the Wayne Foundation does fund Batman).  The next part is pretty undeniably crazy though, Captain Stingaree, who up until this point in his life has never committed a crime decides that he must murder his brothers/Batmen and proceeds to set up elaborate traps to catch them (my personal favorite being rigging Commissioner Gordon's car to explode if he slows down 20 years before Speed came out).  What happens next is weird though, Batman somehow figures the entire plot out from the beginning, talks the other three brothers into dressing up as Batman and allows them to all get kidnapped by Captain Stingaree (luckily guessing right that he wouldn't kill any of them until he had all of them) before teaming up with the Flash to make it seem like there are even more Batmen and saving the brothers.  This drives Captain Stingaree even crazier and he's hauled off to jail, where he's only seen again occasionally in crowds of supervillains.  He later is revealed to be gay and in a relationship with fellow Batman supervillain the Cavalier, showing that even in Arkham Asylum love can blossom.  Oh, and then they both get murdered in a giant supervillain fight.


Let's start with the bad.  Captain Stingaree has absolutely no motivation for becoming a supervillain at all.  While he's implied to be the black sheep of the family (I wonder why), deciding that your brothers are collectively a superhero and you must murder them is bizarre.  He also only picks the identity of Captain Stingaree and the pirate theme because he worked at/owned a pirate themed nightclub.  So if he'd been working at McDonald's Gotham would presumably have a second clown themed supervillain.  Even worse, he doesn't even really do anything pirate related.  Besides the Speed inspiring trap mentioned above, he captures another brother using sewer rats to force him to stay underwater too long, and fake freezing Robin into a block of ice.  Maybe you can claim the attempted drowning as pirate themed, but that seems like a stretch.  Other than that though, he just has a sword and lives on a pirate ship.


On the other hand, Captain Stingaree does have some redeeming qualities as a villain.  His visual design is fantastic, from the tip of his bald head down to his ruffled pants.  And while the whole thing with his brothers is pretty bizarre, it takes a certain kind of intelligence to intuitively guess a connection between Batman and the Wayne Foundation, let alone come up with three deathtraps that conceivably could have caught Batman.  Finally, I like the Stingaree.  Gotham City is known for it's extravagant nightlife (there's got to be a tradeoff for the high crime rate), and the Penguin's Iceberg Lounge could probably use some competition for the tourist dollars.  And Batman fighting his way through a pirate crew to question Captain Stingaree on his ship has to be at least as visually interesting as fighting through a bunch of guys in suits with an Iceberg floating in the background to get to Penguin.


So how do we make Captain Stingaree work moving forward?  His obsession with his brothers and Batman puts his sanity during his introduction into question at best, and when with the help of the Flash Batman makes it seem like there's a softball teams worth of Batmen in existence he probably lost it completely.  Which in Gotham City means that after a short stint in Arkham Asylum, he would be free to return to his life as a nightclub proprietor having made a few new friends (including the love of his life).  His brief career as a costumed supervillain had taught him one thing: while his whole conspiracy about his brothers and Bruce Wayne was crazy, there were multiple Batmen.  He'd seen them with his own eyes.  Now he wasn't up for fighting them personally anymore, but he still felt a certain kinship with his brothers in Arkham and he'd help them whenever and however he could.  After all, they were outnumbered.  And while the Penguin might not let the likes of Signalman, Killer Croc, or Spellbinder into the Iceberg Lounge even when there wasn't a warrant out for their arrest, there would always be a table reserved for them at Stingaree.  And really, who wouldn't want to visit a supervillain dive bar at least once, if only for the story.

I wasn't making it up.

I Expected Better From Karl Rove

Look, I wasn't surprised this morning when the RNC released it's first General Election ad this morning and it consisted of reminding young people that Obama is pretty funny on Jimmy Fallon's show and that Mitt Romney is really dull.  But I expected more from Karl Rove, he's supposed to be good at this.  So take this little test with me.  Watch this ad Karl Rove's SuperPAC just put out, then wait one minute.  If what you most remember is an example of Obama being "cool" then Karl Rove is an idiot:

The Barack Obama I Remember

The quote is from the President's latest interview with Rolling Stone, the whole thing is really worth a read:

Click for larger.

Published as a Public Service Announcement: Time-Out for Talk!


This would have been a much more boring movie than Rebel Without a Cause.

Closeted Countdown: Glee Makes You Gay, It's Just "Teasing", and "Don't Say Gay"

I've long believed that the only thing that could motivate someone to dedicate their lives to homophobia is deep self-loathing. So start the countdown timer until these folks get caught with a gay prostitute:

  • According to Fox New's Bill O'Reilly and Gretchen Carlson, you should not let your kids watch Glee unsupervised because it might make them gay (which personally seems like poor corporate synergy to me since Glee airs on Fox):
  • Missouri has a different solution to the problem of anti-gay bullying, just pretend it's not happening.  Under HB 2051, the proposed "Don't Say Gay" bill, teachers would be banned from discussing homosexuality in any way, including to address anti-gay bullying.  As the bill's cosponsor Dwight Scharnhorst put it, "there is no need to talk about Billy wanting to marry a goat."  Because clearly that's exactly the same as punishing a student for harassing and beating another student because they think he's gay.

The RNC Somehow Manages To Be Dumber Than It Looks

At least that's the only conclusion I can reach from the fact that their very first general election ad is an attempt to appeal to young voters by attacking President Obama for appearing on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.  But hey, they intercut the President and a popular comedian making jokes with Romney giving a boring speech about economics, so surely 20-somethings will come running:

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Weekly Weekend Caption Contest: Winner!

I am very pleased to announce that Anonymous is the new Entertained Organizer Caption King or Queen. So congratulations whoever you are:

Wit of the Web Slinger Wednesday: Wet Hair


I don't know why the man with the pedophile mustache is wearing a trench coat while on his tropical vacation with Spider-Man.  I also don't know where I went wrong with my life that I had to type that sentence just now.

Marco Rubio's Vice Presidential Freudian Slip

Now Marco Rubio has been strenuously denying for weeks that he would be Mitt Romney's running mate if asked.  So of course we shouldn't read anything at all into this:


"3, 4, 5, 6, 7 years from now if I do a good job as Vice President...I'm sorry.  As a Senator.  If I do a good job as a Senator, instead of a Vice President, I'll have a chance to do all sorts of things."

What's Mitt Romney Hiding?

Obama's SuperPAC strikes again (and you really have to wonder what is in Romney's tax returns that he'd rather take hits like this than release them:

Republican Racism Review: Morally Bankrupt, Tar Babies, and Birthers

Real button handed out at the 2008
Texas Republican State Convention
If you start keeping your eyes open for them, there are a terrifying number of news stories about Republicans being racist:
  • On Fox News, Tucker Carlson decided to talk about "an absurd fringe" organization that is "bankrupt literally and morally."  Amazingly, he was not referring to the Gingrich campaign.  Instead he was referring to the NAACP.
  • In an extra special article titled "Negroes with Guns" the totally not racist Ann Coulter argues that if only we gave children guns, Trayvon Martin would still be alive.  She then goes onto ignore the whole "Republican Southern Strategy" thing to obsess about the fact that a hundred and fifty years ago the Democrats were the ones on the wrong side of slavery.  Topical!

Blast from the Past: John Lithgow Reads Gingrich's Press Release

In honor of Newt Gingrich winding down his campaign (rumor has it that he plans to drop out next Tuesday, at a cost to the taxpay of only $40,000 a day until then), I wanted to remember the single best thing he's ever done in decades of public life: Send out a press release so grandiose that only John Lithgow could do it justice:

West Wing Wednesday

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Hostess Snack Break: Spider-Man in "Hotshot on the Block"

Everyone needs a break sometimes, so why don't you enjoy this one with one of your favorite superheroes and one of your favorite Hostess snack treats:


For the record, "Hotshot isn't so hot anymore thanks to Hostess" may be the worse advertising slogan ever.  It's basically a step below "Hostess will make you slow, lethargic, and fat."  I guess I shouldn't be complaining about truth in advertising.  Also why does Spider-Man refer to himself as "cookie"?

Terrific Tuesday Tidings: WORK Moms, Marriage Equality, and Motor Voter Laws

It's Tuesday and that means it's time for my ongoing quest to become a more positive person. Here are the news stories that made me happy this week:
  • It turns out that freak snow storms, horrific hurricanes, and triple digit temperatures in April are enough to change some minds. 69% of Americans now believe that global warming is real and while I question our ability to convince the 30% who still continue to deny it (lets face it that's roughly the % that still supported Bush at the end of his second term, some people are beyond reality), I want to convince that 1% who are unsure.  So we should get on that.  Also maybe remind Congressional Democrats that when 2/3rds of the country agree that a problem exists, you look like the good guy when you try to solve it.
  • Just a reminder in case anyone's forgotten, but unions are wonderful.  If you need some kind of proof, here's how they helped achieve Marriage Equality in Maryland and Washington because as one union leader put it Labor fights for "working families, not just certain families."
  • The National Voter Registration Act of 1993 known as the Motor Votor Act requires states to offer people the opportunity to register to vote when getting a driver's license.  After lowering the voting age to 18 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965, it's easily the single most important piece of legislation in helping people exercise their right to vote.  And after almost 20 years, Georgia has finally dropped their lawsuit against it and will start following the law.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Gabbing About Game of Thrones, S02E04: Garden of Bones

Another week, another episode for Steven of Race for the Iron Throne and I to discuss in Gabbing About Game of Thrones.  This week we hit casting choices, how Leonard Nemoy would feel at home in Qarth, and just how screwed up Joffrey is.  All that and more inside plus the results of our first Reader Contest:


Facts to Be Gleaned from Ron Paul Supporters

Just in case I haven't had enough fun at Ron Paul supporters expense, let's take a look at an image I found on a Ron Paul forum and see what we can learn from it:

Click for larger version

Ok, we've all seen these before, it's a chart of "The Left vs. Right Political Spectrum" representing various ideologies/forms of governments....except something seems off (these are in no particular order of magnitude of insanity):

  • The Democratic and Republican Parties are right next to each other in the very center of the spectrum, helpfully labeled "Left Wing."
  • Monarchy is preferable to either.
  • Fascism is worse than Nazism, but neither is as bad as Socialism.
  • While it appears that the further to the left you go the larger and more tyrannical government is supposed to become at the extreme Left it gives way to Anarchy.
  • A Christian Theocracy is the very definition of "Freedom."
  • Finally, Ron Paul is not only the best form of government, but is better than Christianity and Freedom by a magnitude only slightly smaller than the one separating the Republican Party from Nazism.
Now I'm not going to pretend that those are the only insane things to be found in that image, but I'm afraid if I stare any longer into the abyss, the abyss will stare back into me.  Please add any other amazing insights that can be gleaned from this image in the comments.

Frontline of the Class War: "Isn't Work", Silver Spoons, and "Skin in the Game"

The Republicans are right, there is a class war going on in this country. And they're the ones waging it against the middle and working class:
  • It's always awkward when you're running for President on a policy of cutting the budget and lowering taxes and you stage a photo op of you having a picnic with normal average Americans and they beg you to raise taxes so that you don't have to cut the budget.  At least I assume Mitt Romney knows this is awkward.
  • Speaking of raising taxes, Eric Cantor thinks it's time to raise taxes on the poor (while cutting taxes on the rich) because they have it too easy or something.  Rep. Pat Tiberi agrees because the poor need to "have skin in the game."  Now of course by "skin in the game" he isn't referring to actual skin, because not having health insurance, being a paycheck or two away from being homeless, and not being sure how you're going to feed your kids probably is enough to have poor people very concerned about their skin.  And of course he can't actually mean taxes because due to payroll and sales taxes the poor end up with a higher marginal tax rate.  I guess I don't know what Republicans mean when they talk about the poor getting "skin in the game," unless of course they're just trying to build up resentment against those their policies would damage so that the rest of the country doesn't feel bad about hurting them.  But that would be mean.

Weekly Weekend Caption Contest: Time to Vote

As a reminder, here's this week's photo:


And here are the submissions, vote for your favorite in the comments and then I will tally them up and announce who this week's Entertained Organizer Caption King or Queen is:

Anonymous goes for the Romneybot Joke:

Reader Dave feels a moment of sympathy:

Reader Laura sees etch-a-sketches everywhere:

and Reader Kath may have watched They Live one too many times:

Our contributors have done their job, now it's time for you to do yours, vote for this week's Entertained Organizer Caption Contest King or Queen. Will it be:

Anonymous
Dave
Laura
Kath

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Serious Life Question

Sunday Short: The Lady and the Reaper

Sundays should be a day to rest and relax. And what better way to do that than to take a few minutes to watch an animated short:

In which the Grim Reaper could really use a vacation:

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Republican Racism Review: Birthers, Ethnic Studies, and Trayvon Martin Followup

Real button handed out at the 2008
Texas Republican State Convention
If you start keeping your eyes open for them, there are a terrifying number of news stories about Republicans being racist:
  • Sheriff Joe shouldn't worry though, while Mitt Romney might not be openly calling for Obama to release a birth certificate he already did 4 years ago, Congresswoman Vicky Hartzler (R-MO) is.
  • Georgia is discovering for the second year in a row that if you scare all of your agricultural workers out of the state with draconian immigration laws (seriously, you weren't allowed to be sold water unless you could prove citizenship) that there isn't actually anyone left to do your agricultural work.
  • And in Arizona, the Republicans have decided that removing Ethnic Studies from high schools isn't enough, they need to ban in from their universities too.  Because that doesn't come across as a desperate attempt o rewrite history at all.

Love Lessons with Lois Lane: The Perfect Husband!

In much of the civilized world, Saturday night is date night. And everything I know about dating I learned from Lois Lane. So before heading out for the night, let's see what advice she has for us this week:


Sometimes someone you didn't initially think was right for you is your perfect match.  But you still probably shouldn't let a gameshow called People are Whacky! find your soulmate for you.

He-Man Woman Haters Club Report: A Female Prescription, Nuisances, and "Anchorettes"

With classism, racism, and homophobia already in the mix, why wouldn't the GOP add in some sexism too:
  • Some of you may remember Dr. Keith Ablow as the guy who said that Newt Gingrich being married three times would make him a better President.  Well even if you don't remember him for that, you're probably going to remember him for saying that Hilary Rosen's comments prove that feminists are self-loathing: "They despise the parts of themselves that may be drawn to such roles, as well. That’s why women like Hilary Rosen make such outlandish statements, to begin with. They’re essentially talking to themselves -- albeit, with the rest of the world forced to listen -- trying to reassure themselves that their own choices in life weren’t only equally as good as those of other women, but better."
  • I actually had the privilege of meeting Lilly Ledbetter and getting to hear her explain the Fair Pay Act that bears her name.  Literally all it does is shift the statute of limitations to bring a lawsuit against a discriminatory employer from beginning when the discrimination started to when the discrimination is uncovered.  That way if your boss is good at hiding the fact that he's illegally discriminating against you, he doesn't automatically get away with it.  Really basic right?  The discrimination is already illegal, this just makes sure they can actually be punished for it.  So what do Republicans think of the law?
  • Last week I closed out the He-Man Woman Haters Club Report with Rush Limbaugh calling a sitting Senator a Senatorette, and so it feels appropriate to end this week with him calling CNN's Kyra Phillips an "anchorette."  Maybe it's a tiny thing, but the reason as a society we've been moving away from gender-izing occupational names is because it reenforces the belief that it makes a difference if the practitioner is a man or a woman.  It doesn't matter if a doctor is a man or a woman, it matters that they're a good doctor.  It doesn't matter if a plumber is a man or a woman, it matters that they're a good plumber.  Except to Rush Limbaugh and conservatives like him, they do care.  And that's why they're creating new gendered job titles that have never existed before.